Navigating the Challenges of Dual Caregiving

Understanding Dual Caregiver Stress

The psychological literature identifies several key constructs relevant to dual caregiver experiences. The Conservation of Resources theory posits that psychological stress occurs when individuals perceive a threat to their valued resources—including time, energy, and emotional capacity. For dual caregivers, the constant depletion of these finite resources without adequate replenishment creates a state of chronic stress. This stress can manifest in both psychological and physiological symptoms.

The work-family conflict theory further elucidates three primary forms of interference: time-based conflict (competing demands for time), strain-based conflict (stress in one domain affecting performance in another), and behavior-based conflict (incompatible behavioral requirements across roles). However, there is some good news: certain coping strategies can actually result in work-family enrichment.

The Physical Cost of Caregiving

Professionals with primary caregiving responsibilities at home experience higher rates of emotional exhaustion, anxiety, and depression compared to their non-caregiving counterparts. Neurobiological research using cortisol sampling demonstrates that dual caregivers exhibit dysregulated hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis functioning. Elevated cortisol levels persist well into the evening hours—a pattern typically associated with chronic stress states and increased vulnerability to both mental and physical health complications.

Coping Strategies for Dual Caregivers

It is clear that dual caregiving is both physically and mentally burdensome. But what should we do about it? Here are various empirically-supported strategies that I also utilize myself!

Cognitive-Behavioral Techniques

1. Role Transition Ritual

   A 10-minute structured activity performed when moving between professional and personal caregiving contexts. I personally do this every day to some degree. I use my super fun L.A. commute to listen to audiobooks, music, news, etc., to delineate the transition from home to work (and vice versa). I also always immediately change when I get home from work into a nightgown/loungewear and slippers. This is literally like “taking the day off” of me and transitioning into the home version of me.

   
   

2. Cognitive Reframing Techniques

   Practice using the ABC model (Activating event, Belief, Consequence) to challenge unrealistic expectations. Personally, this is hard for me to do in the moment. But it can be really helpful after-the-fact to understand one’s triggers and behaviors. For example, I might flip out and yell at the kids for being too loud while I am trying to make dinner.

3. Activating event: Kids are yelling/fighting/stomping around.

4. Belief: “I can’t deal with all this commotion while I am trying to make dinner after working all day!”

6. Consequence: I yell and feel bad about it.

Later, I reflect on this chain of events and see that I get easily overstimulated in the evenings. Now I understand that I need to set the kids up for success and engage them in quieter activities.




7. Implementation of the "STOP" Technique

   Stop, Take a breath, Observe thoughts and feelings, Proceed mindfully. Again, this is hard for me to do in the moment, but helpful when I do it! You can see a ridiculous video of me practicing this technique HERE.

   
   

Social Support

• Conduct Social Network Mapping

  Identify current support resources and gaps in your network.

  
  

• Implement Reciprocal Support Arrangements

  Collaborate with other dual caregivers to share responsibilities and support.

  
  

• Establish Professional Peer Consultation Groups

  Focus on caregiver-specific challenges to foster understanding and support.

  
  

Mindfulness Practices

1. Daily Mindfulness Practice

   Engage in a 20-minute mindfulness practice using body scan or breath awareness techniques. There are many apps and free content on YouTube for guided activities.

   
   

2. Micro-Mindfulness Practices

   Incorporate 2-3 minute breathing spaces between activities. Even 30 seconds can help when I’m short on time!

   
   

3. Mindful Caregiving Practices

   Bring present-moment awareness to routine caregiving tasks. For instance, when I am frustrated with brushing my 4-year-old's teeth while she wriggles like a slippery eel, I remind myself that there will be a day when I will never brush her teeth again. This helps me appreciate the experience in a mindful way.

   
   

Division of Labor

• Fair Play

  If you are in a partnership, this system is amazing. It helps conceptualize and organize the division of labor in a household. Importantly, this technique captures invisible labor, which women traditionally take on at greater levels.

  
  

Conclusion

Navigating the complexities of dual caregiving can be overwhelming. However, by implementing effective coping strategies, seeking social support, and practicing mindfulness, we can alleviate some of the stress. Remember, you are not alone in this journey. There are resources and communities available to support you.

Further reading:

Kokorelias KM, Rittenberg N, Scali O, Smith-Bayley S, Gignac MAM, Naglie G, et al. (2025) A scoping review to examine health care professionals’ experiences as family caregivers. PLoS ONE 20(1): e0308657.